Draft radio script based on 'Who wants to be a millionaire?', for a Yorkshire FM station, hopefully for Good Friday... 'Millionaire?' type tense music bed to go underneath.
CT (Chris Tarrant): Welcome back to the show, where Derek is already sitting on a big prize… Del, you know what’s at stake here. You ready for the final question?
D: Ready Chris.
CT: Let’s take a look.
CT: What’s going to be the NUMBER ONE goal in your life? Will it be: A – a fabulous body? B – a happy family? C - to get stinking rich ? Or D - friendship with God?
Del: Crikey.
CT: That’s one way of putting it. (audience titters).
D: Well, let’s go through them.
CT: Take your time.
D: The body‘s certainly tempting. Envy of my friends. Women falling at my feet.
CT: Now Derek, I’m sure that’s happening already. (audience titter)
Del: I wish.. But then, I’d give a lot for my family to be really happy.
CT: Wouldn’t we all.
D: ‘Get stinking rich‘... Lot to be said for that too. Not having to worry about the future. Keeping up with the Jones’s .
CT: Not to be sniffed at. Specially in these times.
D: Yeah.
CT: So I take it you’re ruling out friendship with God?
Del: Tricky one isn’t it? I suppose considering He’s the one running the show, it couldn’t be a bad thing.
CT: Can’t see him though can you? Money, good body, those are things you can see and touch.
D: Yeah… But a great body’s not going to stay that way is it? And money can buy you stuff, but can it make you happy?
CT: This is getting a bit deep for a quiz show (titter). Ok Del, but happy family, your nearest and dearest. Surely that’s gotta be number one.
D: I dunno. I’m just thinking about, you know, Jesus on the cross, how much he put on the line for me. I’ve just got a feeling that if you’re friends with God, that might take care of the other things too.
CT: Sounds like a gamble to me. It’s your decision Del.
D: Think I’m gonna go for it Chris. Yep. D Friendship with God.
CT: Final answer?
D: Final answer.
CT: We’re gonna take a break, be back shortly. (audience groans)
(Out music)
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16 comments:
First question - which god (and why)?
Second question - can we be friends with someone who does not return your calls and just basically ignores you?
Third question - is it logically possible to be friends with a logically impossible being?
Do you know any married bachelors, or male mares? Not logically possible – I think you have the same problem with how you would define the Christian God... All-loving, All-knowing, all-powerful??
Doesn’t work in my book.
Take care :-)
Lee
PS
I like the style of what you are doing, I just cannot understand your conclusion, sorry. Still, a fun read. Keep up the good work
What's your aim? If it's preaching to the converyed, then fine. If it's evangelism, it fails.
Like Lee says, you cant be friends with someone who ignores you.
Also, what exactly did jesus do? He was supposedly god, so sacrificing himself really was not a sacrifice at all - he gave up nothing, Zero, Zip, Nada, www.Zilch.com, diddley-squatsville Tennessee....
Incidentaly, I'm working on my anti testimony if you are interested
PS, If god/Allah/Ra really wanted to be my friend, you'd think he'd at least appear (awaits, typical baseless presuppositionalism about my motives or god is not santa claus etc)
i dont know about the converting - since augustines time there has been the idea of continual conversion.
Im certainly back off to my humble life - reconverted. Friendship with god is an alluring concept - to be friends with something we don't understand somehow seems to put all our other friendships into perspective
silence and love mr gulland silence and love....
Friendship with god is an alluring concept - to be friends with something we don't understand somehow seems to put all our other friendships into perspective
Dont you find that worrying? What basis is that for a friendship?
billy
i am no more worried by my lack of understanding of god than i am by my lack of understanding of you. Unless you would like me to claim that I understand somebody - which would in my book be tantamount to intellectual rape or kidnapping - Im not sure which ? - in fact its probably both.
lee
what would you say if i said the western christian view of god is merely a workable personification of the infinite - do you think christians actually think god is god ? how many do you think have ever thought about it ?
r.
lee,
Maybe if take biology - lets say we are little cells inside a bigger body which is god - from inside our little cells - we cant every fully understand that big body but we can be "down with it" - cook burgers in the sun and enjoy it.
like all of bruces atheist hyena's your squashing the faith down to something noone i know would accept - you objectify faith - thinking you can demolish it - but as soon as you make it into an object it is over. Just like if you tried to define love - we would all end up thinking we didnt love our wives. The only person who would be in love would be the dictionary. When was the last time you told you lady you loved her and she said - define that ?
Faith is what goes on around these idols, concepts, metaphors which you keep trying to smash. You hyenas always seem to mistake the horse for the cart. All loving all knowing all powerful. These mares are simply trying to pull the ineffable - which is admittably an impossible job.
But what I will say is that throughout religions an appreciation of the whole of life - an existential leap in to accepting it all - known and unknown - without dismay - with rather faith - is associated with hope, love and compassion.
Well thats the best way I can describe it in abstract - in truth most christians are just happy with the phrase "jesus loves you" - and Im afraid no one could ever tell you what that means. Symbols have multiple interpretations - you keep looking for the one and only meaning and i'm not suprised you think what you make is a load of crap. It would have to be.
In my humble opinion. If you tried to take up a functional appreciation of religion - what is it doing for the people who practice it - religion might make more sense to you.
Anyway Its all good nigga. As biggie smalls says. Is it still summer out there ?
r.
Hi R,
Have to be real brief… about go out.
what would you say if i said the western christian view of god is merely a workable personification of the infinite
How does the ‘personal’ bit about God fit into this?
I’ve no problem if someone uses the label ‘god’ for the unknown (or unknowable) – just a little confusing.
However the Christian thinks God listens to prayers and intervenes in life on Earth – this is not then a description of the infinite.
Nice try though :-)
how many do you think have ever thought about it ?
Zero… All Christians think their God listens to them – the ‘infinite’ would not give a damn. How could it?
like all of bruces atheist hyena's your squashing the faith down to something noone i know would accept
I am still waiting for something to describe the value of faith in understanding the truth about the universe.
Until that time, I just don’t understand faith the Christian places so much value in.
Sorry.
When was the last time you told you lady you loved her and she said - define that ?
Actually, I have asked the wife (when she told me she loved me one time) to define what she meant by love.
After about 5 mins, she hit me.
I guess that is love :-)
In my humble opinion. If you tried to take up a functional appreciation of religion - what is it doing for the people who practice it - religion might make more sense to you.
Religion and God are too different things.
Religion can be good for some people – and awful for others.
If a religion tells me to stop asking questions and obey without question – I will hate it.
Lee
PS
Summer is over... it is raining at the moment and I have a cold :(
Religion and God are too different things.
Religion can be good for some people – and awful for others.
If a religion tells me to stop asking questions and obey without question – I will hate it.
so thats three things we agree on...
Im going out to - so brevity will have to match yours.
That the universe is dynamically responsive to our intent - is very much a christian truth. Its part of a leap of faith - there are problems with making this.
But there are also problems with not making it. Since according to biggie smalls there are no problems - I'm not so sure I want to worry about apparent solutions. But lets play with this....
Christians can be accused of talking to themselves. The empiricist might claim they are like children talking to the cinema screen while watching "bolt 3-d". But then the empiricist can be accused of just being a spectator in the universe - a small dot of phenomenology observing a vast and indifferent choas.
Horses for courses really...
Im not sure dividing things up so simply really has any value. I mean :
hope your cold gets better soon
- its raining here as well
best wishes
p.s. in passing the value of faith to me is that it acts as a vehicle for a phenomenological and somatic acceptace of the world - that it provides a foundation for hope. It might be possible to short cut straight to these virtues - but in my personal experience the people who claim to do this usually short circuit and cant maintain it - which i suppose is where religion and group discipline come in...
Rob,
My point is that you know that god kills people in the bible. If I killed people, would you be my friend and just put it down to a lack of understanding me?
Your answer to lee lacks any substance or coherences and certainld does not address his questions.
Billy, I'd love to read your anti testimony - hope you name names!
;-)
Your answer to lee lacks any substance or coherences
what type of coherences would you like billy. I will happily accept charges of insubstantiabilty - since I think your approach is overly objective. But coherences - as far as I am aware I am reasonably aware of the implications and interconnections of my approach. The connections may be looser than what you would permit - but then I dont think there are any real connections in what I see as your monosyllabic anti-theology. Do you listen to much music ?
regarding your question -
you know that god kills people in the bible
Is that a "bad" thing - biggie smalls wasnt worried about getting whacked.
anyway Im not popping in for long
my login details for trophy manage have just come through - back to the real world...
Just read C.B.'s comment : anti-testimony ?
Post-modernism is complete - we can buy it in a bookshop next to the book on "christian shamanism". But seriously if you pubish billy let me know - it would be nice to get a picture of the "real billy" as they sort of say to dorothy in gregories girl.
anyway - some nice penalties during the week ? just when I the joy of caleys win was fading - the b-mehmet - moth did the same to us - only on sunday will we know who is really the biggest old firm let down. This season it seems not being the worst - is the only prize left.
what type of coherences would you like billy.
Nothing has anything concrete to build upon. It appears like a list of unsubstantiated claims all thrown together. Is there nothing objective about your faith? If not, then surely you are aware how meaningless that would make it? Then you would have no reason to believe it over any other collection of unsubstantiated calims - so what is it that does it for you .
I would rather have a proper answer to my question about whether you would be my friend if I was a mass murderer/rapist/whatever disgusts you before heading off on another tangent
Is that a "bad" thing - biggie smalls wasnt worried about getting whacked.
??????
CB
Mibbes :-)
Sorry for my lack of response thus far, will catch up over a lunch or two this week...
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