Friday 17 September 2010

friendship across the boundaries

Change of subject. Getting a bit more personal and risky here. But it’s an interesting topic so here goes. Dating. I have quite a ‘local’ approach to friendship and dating, ie not greatly inclined to try and develop a relationship at a distance. I like to be able to meet up with someone for a drink or whatever, fairly easily. Some might call it a green approach too!
But there’s a problem. It’s not been easy to find a suitable match in the immediate locality ie Leeds/Bradford/west Yorkshire. My ‘base’ church is a small local parish one with as far as I’m aware currently not a single eligible female present! And while getting to know a few folk who are a little further afield via christian websites and networks, my sociability and love of meeting new attractive interesting people, has led me to seek out ways of meeting people locally who may not have a christian or indeed any other faith.
There is something liberating about this. For a long time I feel, in retrospect, I often closed doors to potentially good friendships at the very least because I was seeking a relationship with someone who explicitly shared my faith. An at times it felt limiting. On the other hand, I don’t envisage pursuing a friendship/relationship with someone beyond what is comfortable with the simultaneous pursuit of the absorbing quest of relating to God.
We’ll see what happens.

6 comments:

Billy said...

If your attitude is that a potential partner should one day convert, I would say that such pre-concieved expectations are not healthy grounds for a relationship. What would you do if she never shows any signs of wanting to convert?

A wee tip - whenever I'm out with a group of your friends, the talk always turns to god at some point - very unattractive for a non believer - especially if they find some aspect of the chat potentially offensive.

Bruce said...

interesting question and point billy, i'm sure i'll come back to this one.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

All the bunny boilers probably don't help either Billy ;)

Lisa Cuellar said...

I went this route you're on. In some ways was a nice detour...but all it is in the end is a detour, not a destination.

Bruce said...

thanks lisa, but don't over-read what i'm saying... :)
may see you tomorrow..